July 15, 1974 (Letter from Sue)

How are you??!  I've thought of you and spoken (most fondly, of course) of you millions of times -- but it's taken me lo! these three weeks to get around to actually writing.

How was the convention?!  I expect a full report, written in your inimitable style on all of the going, and, of course, comings!  Did you get any good job leads?  Any interesting meetings to go to? Any scandals?!  (Like did George Grant go berserk and try to pay a midnight visit to Sister What's Her Name in her room at the Taft?)  Did you see our friend Sue and her continuing oral history project? Did you see my ex-heart throb Erwin?!!!  (How did he look -- )  How was the bus trip?  How was Blanche?  Did you stay in the Hilton, and who paid?  In short, I want to know everything!

I'm missing Pittsburgh and the exciting low key life at GSLIS, I find -- though I am enjoying SF -- very nice dry sunshine here -

I am not sure at this point whether we will arrive in Pgh before school lets out (though naturally I want to make it back there (no pun intended) before the big PARTY!  We may not arrive till around the 15th -- will you still be there?  Let me know because I really want to see you.

SF, as I said,k is fine -- though I have been put to work (which I feel is practically like being put out to pasture).  Bart said "You work" and so I got a job through a temporary agency which more than ever convinces me that I do not like or want to do secretarial work.   But it's just for a month -- 2 wks of which are already finito, so I'll just bear with it for awhile longer.  The only good thing is that I am pulling in $4 per hour (before taxes, natch).  I started out at $3.25 and had to register a mild complaint about this not being commensurate with my vast skills, poise, experience, intelligence, etc.  So they very fairly raised my pay.

At the same time I am trying to finish my 210 project for Wendell -- I've transcribed one tape plus half of another -- so I have 1 1/2 short ones to go.  What a debilitating job.  No wonder Rosemary Woods lost 18 minutes!  Mainly though, I want to get this thing out of the way and off my back -- I don't like the image of Wendell's spirit continually perched on my shoulder.

I had dinner w/ some Berkeley library school grads the other night-- and frankly, I think our illustrious institution is better for a lot of things.  Cal is a real snob school, completely computer science and academic research library oriented.  The Dean, whom I already hated based upon an infamous application interview, is a real ivory tower man and a swish (as opposed to gay) to boot. They concentrate on its PhDs -- the only good thing about Cal is that there are many, many jobs for the grad students as well as a limitless number of "field research" (like 219, etc( courses to take -- only 1 required course, so you can design your own program -- But -- in terms of faculty -student rapport and accessibility of administrative power within our own school, we are way ahead. At Berkeley the students are discouraged from the very beginning in the possibility of getting jobs, they are left completely to their own devices (you would probably like that), their student organization is even less together than ours (my friends were very impressed with the bus to ALA) -- and Cal has a very racist-sexist-snobbish admissions policy (absolutely no one admitted w less than a 3.0).   Their curriculum meets the students' needs even less than ours, and it sounds as if they have virtually no opportunity for student input into the decision-making system (as Patty Penland would say).

I know Pitt has many failings -- boring and meaningless classes, jerks like B.N. and his OCSC speech to us, etc.  But still, I would rather have gone to Pitt than UC, even if the latter is supposedly ranked 4 or 5 in the nation.

I do hope that life in Pittsburgh is progressing at a merry rate, aside from Lib school.  Have you seen any movies lately?  We saw Polanski's Chinatown recently -- excellent -- good evocation of 30's period w/out being overly nostalgic.  Very powerful, if somewhat despairing film on corruption. I'm reading about 5 books -- or trying to -- Terkel's Hard Times and Agee's Let Us Now Praise Famous Men among them. Also one which you might like -- Erica Jong's Fear of Flying -- a very funny feminist approach to the existential dilemma ("theory of the zipless fuck", which you should appreciate) though a bit overstated at times.

Well, my dear -- I shall close for now.  Please write me -- and tell all!  Especially how much longer you will be in Pittsburgh -- OK --

July 14, 1974 (Letter from Tony)

This letter, rather than being a flowing image filled masterpiece of letter-writing, is designed for informational purposes only.

I'm leaving Walla Walla, by bus, Aug 9 or 10, and I could go to Lake Spread Eagle if you'll be there Aug 11 or 12th.  Or I may go directly on to Columbus  Ohio to see my sister, and go up to Colden, possibly through Pittsburgh or Warren.  I expect to spend a little more than a week in Colden, then go on to Portsmouth, N.H. to visit my friend Jerry.  From there I'm going to Boston to see Michael and travel with him to the wedding.  If you were at the Cape, say from Aug 20-30, I could see you there.

There is a possibility of side trip to Montreal to see Ralph Pearson, who I believe is working in the Queen Elizabeth (Hilton International) in that city.  I probably will be doing the Greyhound Ameripass trip so my travel plans can be adjusted pretty easily.  I hope to run into you somewhere along the way.

P.S.  I enjoyed your short stories very much.  A more detailed discussion can be had when we get together.

P.S.S.  Marmul went to Atlanta, Ga. with old George Pakin, the Albany gambling man.

June 20, 1974 (Letter from Tony)

Now I'm ready to write you a good letter.  My letter-writing was put on hold about 2 months ago as the end of the school year drew near and my creative energy faded away.  My exams were no big thing, but I find law school and the particular social relationships I've developed (or not developed) to be rather stifling.  My response to that is to move into an apartment by myself next year  and work hard first semester and then have only Tuesday and Thursday classes my second and last semester   So much for the distant future. 

Actually the character of events I was involved in in Berkeley was on the upbeat, but my mind set was such that I was not responding as fully as I would like.

I'm now into my annual summer coasting period, this year the place is Walla Walla, Washington.  I'm working with Prison Legal Services in the maximum security prison.  Let me back up a bit so you can grasp the fortuity of the events which led me to Walla Walla.  Before I do that, I'll back up a bit more and tell you about the visit of Michael and Liz.

Just about a month ago I was rushing through my studying as I could be done on the Wednesday before my exams started because that was then M & L were to come.  I had substantially completed my reading when they showed up.  It was really good to see Michael.  His cheerfulness is infectious.  It wasn't quite as good to see Liz.  Although she came across as being friendlier this time than at any other time I have been around here, she still has the knack of making people feel uneasy far too often.

I'm not sure if it's just that she is so incredibly jealous about Michael and anyone else or if she is always this way, even when she and Michael are alone.  I'm more and more convinced that she's always the abrupt, petulant little girl trying to be so serious and often stepping on the toes, unnecessarily, of those around her.

What puzzles me somewhat is why Michael is attracted to her.  Actually I can think of a number of reasons but none of them seem sufficient.

I'm firmly of the opinion that Michael should not marry her, that Liz has been and continues to be the major driving force behind their plans to get married, and her compulsion derives somehow from her Catholic upbringing.

While they were out here, they went to Sausalito to go shopping.  Liz's idea.  They went to a jewelry store to look at rings.  Liz's idea.  There was a $150 ring that fit Michael, although they had previously "decided" not to spend money on wedding rings, it was Liz's idea that Michael buy the ring.  Michael agonized all afternoon, going into the store, walking back to the car, hitting his head again the steering wheel, and then repeating the cycle. In the end Liz won out and Michael bought the ring.

I feel sorry for Michael on their wedding day.  I'm sure her parents are going to press for a major affair.

Michael can bring much happiness to those around him, he deserves someone better suited to his needs than Liz.  Well, I got a little carried away there.  I am still not sure what I should do, I'm tempted to write Michael a letter and explain why I don't think he should get married to Liz.  But that may only offend him, and would surely offend her and the chances of it accomplishing anything are quite slim.  But I think I must, as a friend.

Now then, on to cheerier things.  At lunch one day during exams Bill Chang, a friend and fellow law student, mentioned that he was driving to Seattle because he had a summer job there and he was looking for someone to come along because it's a long ride.  (20 hours by car.)  I like the idea of seeing Oregon and Washington so I said I'd like to.  We left on June 2, and had a very fine drive up.

For all my time in California I have been bothered by the weather, the rain and fog and cold in the winter and the lack of rain during the summer were just too unlike Buffalo and Colden for me to appreciate.  One day I asked Molly, a woman who lived in the same house I was living in, how she could stand the grass dying and the hills turning brown in the summer.  She looked surprised and said "I always thought they turned golden."  Oh wow.

Anyway, on my way up north I finally was able to take in the beauty of the hills and the dark green oak greets and the clear blue sky.  It certainly is what's "natural" there even if it didn't meet my expectations.

We drove up near the coast through Oregon and Washington.  The Coastal range reminded me of the Appalachians back East.  Extremely pretty, green tree-covered, gentle hills and mountains.

It was raining when we drove into Seattle.  And it continued for the next two days.  Bill was a big glum about moving to a city where he knew no one and he was a bit apprehensive about his job.  I decided that Seattle might be a decent place to live for a summer and I knew I would enjoy living with Bill.

I went to the placement office at the Univ of Wash law school and could find only one interesting sounding job, with Prison Legal Services.  I was eligible for work-study and they wanted someone on work study.  So I called them up, they said come in this afternoon for an interview and I did and they said you've got a job if you want it but the first part of the summer you'll have to go to Walla Walla.  I thought about that overnight.  Bill went to work that day and found the job to be quite easy with several very nice people working there.  And we had found him a fine studio apartment.  That plus the fact that Walla Walla sounded like it was quite different from any place I've ever lived led me to accept the job.  I was to fly to Walla Walla the next day with one of the attorneys coming to Walla Walla for some big thing.

That evening Bill and I went up the space needle just before sunset.  Mt. Rainier, even though it was 90 miles away, was huge and snow-covered.  The Olympic Mountains, quite substantial ones to my surprise, were between Seattle and the ocean and it was over them that the sun set.  It was just tremendous.

The next morning I flew from Seattle on Cascade Airlines.  Cascade is smaller than Mohawk was.  It schedules no flights on Saturday   0.  Walla Walla has been very pleasant and relaxing.  It's well irrigated and has trees but not much in the way of excitement.  I flew back to Oakland to get my clothes etc.  While I was there I scoured all the used book stores in Berkeley and bought 4 of the books you recommended.  So far I've read A Cool Million and What I'm Going to Do I Think.  I liked the early chapters of A Cool Million, it got to be a bit too much after that.  The second book I enjoyed very much.  He was able to capture many of the emotions I've felt but never have heard described.  The other two are At Play in the Fields of the Lord and The Journal of Albion Moonlight.  I'll be working here until Aug 10th or so, then head back to Colden, Columbus, Pittsburgh, Albany, Boston, and New York.  I'm thinking of getting an Ameripass from Greyhound, I could travel by bus for 1 month.  It costs $189 and would get me back and forth and all around.  Let me know when you graduate and where you'll be between Aug 10th and Sept 1.  See you soon.

June 9, 1974 (Letter from Michael)

It's taken me a while to write back, but here I am.  Today was so damned hot, above 90.  It is still hot now -- 10pm.  As I sit here writing sweat is running down my arms and face, so if any smears appear in this letter it will not be tears.  Rather it will be the sweat that comes from toiling over a rough assignment such as this letter.

You know I always worry when writing letters to English majors or the like?  I get nervous that my speling may not be correct, or punctuation: or that my word usage may not be well or grammer. Library students frighten me even more.  Probably a great number of English majors would never know there was anything wrong with my writing, but librarians would know where to look to find out.

Well enough with the serious stuff, now with the bullshit.  (But first it should be noted that I am not stoned, high, or anything else, just very hot.)  Elizabeth and I are getting married.  (Do you want to check that last sentence over again?)  Yes, it's true.  Sept 1.  We just decided the end of April. We're very content with each other and are determined to come to terms w/ our fantasies. Actually we love each other enough but more practically and realistically are the financial advantages, i.e. taxes, insurance, presents, etc.  And also it makes it a bit easier to plan a future together.  Not that I am trying to rationalize the situation.  We do love each other and have come to the realization and decision that we could be most happy with each other.  (My brother, always one to look to for support in trying times said, "So why ruin a good friendship?")

In any event Liz's parents are ecstatic that we are headed out of a relationship of sin and into one of morality and legitimacy.  The event takes place as I said on Sept 1 in her back yard in Spring Valley, N.Y.  It's to be a casual affair, casual dress, good food and drink, and a good time.  We were going to do the ceremony ourselves but the prevailing opinion determined that it should be someone "official", hence my uncle who's a N.Y. State Supreme Court Judge.  You're invited even if you can't come, but I hope you can.  (Their house is just 20 minutes outside of New York City.) Tony expects to be able to come.

Which brings up another subject -- our trip to California.  We had a great time.  First went to Palm Springs to see my grandparents, then went to L.A. and Farmer's Market.  We had a rented car and drove up the coast to Frisco.  What a beautiful, fantastic drive!  (I suppose you know all about it.)  Took about 2 days to do that, stopping along the way, staying over, taking a tour of the Heart Castle at San Simeon.  That was an incredible place.  An example of obnoxious, flaunted American wealth, at the same time very beautiful and very well put together.  (Ah, some day it will belong to the people.) 

We spent 3 days in San Francisco with Tony taking us all over the place.  We had a good, fun time there.  Tony was fine and we were both glad to see each other.

Now we are back with the "post-vacation blues", back to work and reality.  The store has been doing relatively well, that means better, but I am still in debt thanks to my brother.  But I've halved it.  It was about $6,000 now it's about $3,000.  So before when I used to wake up twice in the middle of the night to remind myself, now I get up only once.

6/12/74 - Hi, back again.  So what's up with you?  Are you going to Manhasset?  Write back as soon as you can. I hope we can get together over the summer.

May 14, 1974 (Letter from Elaine Seaton)

I was glad to hear from you.

There must be another (better) way...I'm really concerned about your method of earning money.  Even giving (selling) blood sounds better than what you're doing.  At lest the blood replenishes itself -- and they won't keep taking it if you show adverse reactions.

Please...

I'm truly concerned.  Your tone sounds low.

The situation here has changed.  The man on my staff who I thought would be leaving has decided to stay.  (For which I have to say, I'm glad.  He's good -- he's nice -- and after one year he now can really first be truly actively contributing.)

For which I also want to say -- I'm sorry.  'Cause it means there is no opening for you.

We'll be adding a librarian trainee, but that's it.

I will also be at ALA.  If there is any way I can help you locate yourself, please do call on me.

Very good luck, and take care.

Regards to Sue.

Note from Grayce (April 30, 1974)

I just wanted to thank you for making my birthday happy and also for all the sweet things you've done for me.   (and even the not-so-sweet things, i.e., warning me of the dangers of that hated phantom of the pantry -- SUGAR!)

Much love.

P.S.  I loved that card you made a million times more than any you could have bought.

April 23, 1974 (Letter from Chris)

Sorry it's taken me so long to return your letter, but a number of things have come up which have kept me from sitting down.

First off, I've left my job at the Great Gatsby (where I had been transferred) to find a happier working environment.  For the last 3 weeks, unemployment has been my only occupational activity.  It seems it was easier to get everything done when I was working then it is now.  Between going to unemployment offices -- this office, that office, and job hunting  I put in more work than I did working at the restaurant.

My other time consumer is trying to find an apartment for the summer and fall.  Cheri and I are going to move.  Her mother is moving back to Buffalo, so we have to find separate apartments. This is not all bad however -- since things have been getting very tense at times between Cheri and myself.  I will probably look for a place with Zeb, a friend of mine from Pakistan -- and his girlfriend from Tahiti (or is it Haiti).  When I find where I'm at -- I'll send you the address.  

Right now I'm listening to Beethoven's 6th and my two canaries, that think it's an opera.  They make more noise than any pet I've ever had.  I was going to roast them at first, but I've decided to prove my superiority by tolerating them.

I think you told me two (or was it three) times before that you had broken ties with her.  I just read an article in Cosmo about men like you -- who possess weak, obsessive women until they are no longer needed and then casually discard them until they are needed again.  You always were a monster Paul!

Getting back to reality -- I hope your job this summer -- whether in Boston or N.Y. -- is enjoyable. Either way I'm sure it will be better than a Buffalo summer.

In your letter, you ask about a noticed changed in my social life.  Yes, it seems that all I do is work, go out for a drink, come home, go to sleep, do my odds and ends for 3 or 4 hours, and then start all over again.  My day off is almost always a different combination of the same 5 activities. Visit Cheri's relatives, do a laundry, go to a movie, cook a meal, get stoned and watch TV.  That's about it.  It really gets to be a drag.  My life is so "normal" and "regular", I can predict Cheri's stomach aches, headaches, menstrual cramps.  I am very slowly beginning to break out of that.  I am not strong enough to do it all at once -- I suppose because I don't want to hurt Cheri -- or myself.  Getting separate apartments will be the beginning.  Then if I can find a nice job -- most other problems will work themselves out.

So Paul -- when you get around to it, write again -- let me know where you'll be this summer.

I'll send you my new address as soon as I know it.  Take care.