December 1977 (Christmas Card from Dick Peel)

How's the winter!  I think of all my friends as I go for a swim.  Still busy exploring this area and loving the cultural advantages of the metro area.  Going back to Montana for several weeks of skiing and visiting in January.  Not sure my thin blood will cope.  I miss Helena.

Job goes well -- designing special projects and consultant on present ones.

How's your piano studies progressing?  Have heard some of the greats this year.

Got to DC & N.Y. this summer, combining please with business.  Been to Calif several times -- love the ocean and have friends with homes right on the cliffs overlooking the water.

In between have spent a lot of time on my silver work and reading near the pool (a necessity to be close by the pool in the summer).

My family is here again for the winter -- about 12 miles from me.

Saw Jim Estelle (former warden at MSP).  He's doing great things in Texas.

Many friends have visited or are planning a visit (but only in the winter)?  Never enough hours in any day.

Do keep in touch.  If you travel t his direction the welcome mat is always out.

October 23, 1977 (Letter from Kathy and Gary)

Are you still out there somewhere??

Received a letter from Dody and Wendy in Tenn.  In case she didn't write:
5652 Hinton Place
Memphis 38117

Dody decided to give up teaching in February for a career in the Coast Guard.

Gary is off to Bend, Oregon, to a 100 mile motorcycle race.  I would have gone except I felt I should to go a dental hygiene meeting in Pocatello yesterday.

Rick & Linda had a baby girl in late July, early August and ours is due the end of February.  We felt things were stable enough now to do such a foolish thing.

Any progress in the wife search for you?  Just married off the perfect girl for you.  We were just in L.A. visiting them.  We decided to get a good vacation in so Disneyland became our destination. We traveled down on our 1000-cc Honda motorcycle.  Came back through Sequoia and Yosemite National Forests and snow!  We had fun at Harrah's Antique Car Collection in Reno for 2 1/2 hours -- could have stayed much longer.  Anyway, that strikes out something that Gary has always wanted to do (bike to Cal. & the car collection) and Disneyland for me.  It was beautiful weather and a delightful trip.

We do plan to make our migration east for our 10 year reunion this summer.

Anxious to hear where you are and if you are happy.

Gary has a new accomplishment -- a 200cc motorcycle he built and designed himself.

Have had fantastic summer and fall weather.  Do have a guilt complex enjoying it though since we need rain so badly and lots of snow this summer winter!

Had a neat garden.

Schneider's visited us for 2 weeks in September.   Anxious for their first grandchild!

I'm anxious to get out for a little job.  My back is sore from sitting here.  Needed very badly to get some long overdue letters off.  Was thinking, your name appeared, and decided I might as well wake you up.

Take care.

July 24, 1977 (Letter from Grayce)

The sun is relentless -- this paper is helping a bit -- to remind me that there are such things as trees, shade & bodies of water.

I forgot if  I mentioned to you that Brook's parents flew out here for a week to visit.  Of course, I was a nervous wreck for a whole week before -- and as a result I broke out in a rash.  On my hands -- fortunately.  It wasn't one you could notice.  It just itched!  I seem to insist on punishing myself.  I really think sometimes that I would have been a good cloistered nun!  (Except that I'd never be able to keep still & silent as long as they do!)  Anyway, all the worrying was for nothing, because it was a pleasant week.  I cooked "American" -- so there wasn't any problem with anyone not liking anything & Brook's mom made one of her scrumptious apple pies & I made a Boston creme pie, so we had plenty of sweets around (for which I feel guilty now, but .....)  I think they had a good time, but I don't think they liked the area much.  Brook's father thinks there's nothing better than Pgh. (just like me abt. Philly!!!), but after a year here, I've come to appreciate this place very much. I love seeing nothing but mountains & clouds & sky.  I think living in a city after this will fell awfully claustrophobic!

We did get to show them a reactor out in the desert.  (Not the one where Brook is, cause you can't get in there) but it was interesting to me because I learned a lot.  Our tour guide was a man  who does research in nuclear physics (and gives these tours for 1 month each summer) & he really had a lot of information & insight to share with us.  We were going to take them to Yellowstone, too, but it was so hot, none of us felt like riding 8 hours (4 each way) and then going down to Salt Lake the next day, which we did do.  We stayed there 2 days -- 3 nights, and got to see some things we didn't see the last visit.

Your idea for Spread Eagle sounds great & thank you for thinking of us.  We certainly will think about it.  Actually, we don't realty know where we'll be next year at this time, or maybe earlier. There's always the chance of a transfer for Brook -- or even of a new job offer.  Th is field is very open right now.  Brook has been approached by Rochester Gas & Elec. Co & they've asked him to come out for an interview, but he's not sure if he wants to or not.  It may not be [scrawl] (I do speak English) the type of job he wants to get into right now.  If he does take this job, though, we may get to see each other more often!  Everything feels very up in the air to me right now and I'm not sure I'm going to look forward to moving again after just 1 year.  I feel like a gypsy sometimes and I did want to be here for at least another year, to get to see some more of the area although we've done a lot on the little time off that Brook has.

Your American History project sounds like it's really interesting.  You must be so full of information.  Do you feel that the books, on the whole, present a truthful or distorted picture?  I mean -- even in this time, when so much is being supposedly "exposed" -- I don't believe the ordinary person, or even the historian gets anything like the whole truth.  So I'm just wondering about the earlier times & whether they've hidden much, which I'm sure they have.  But, I guess, my real question is, can you discern little gaps of information where you are puzzled by things that are left out?

I've heard a few things about the Revolutionary era, which puzzled me -- although I suppose if I did some extensive reading, most of them could be cleared up.  One of them has to do with a supposed murder at Jumonville (sp) which Washington was thought to have committed.  Have you reach much concerning this?  If so, maybe you could give me a concise explanation, lazy wretch that I am!!!  If you ever need Prevention info, don't hesitate to ask, and if I've covered your subject, I'll be glad to send any information along.  I was considering just buying Prevention Press' Encyclopedia of Natural Medicine, but maybe I'll do that later.  I have less & less faith in doctors lately, not that I ever thought they were great, but I just feel that they do so much unnecessary surgery, and so many don't even want to hear about any drugless therapy.  Even pharmacists aren't open to natural healing -- which is understandable, I suppose, since it could put a few of them right out of business!!

I really like Am Heritage.  I've read quite a few of those -- mostly while I was at Seton Hill.

Well, this month I'm going to look forward to getting ready to exhibit my work in the Eastern Idaho Fesstival in Blackfoot.  So far I have a weaving and a watercolor, which both need some preparation before they're entered.  Also, I've completed my first lino cut, but haven't made any prints from it yet.  It's going to be called "Harmony", I think.  It's a picture of the moon & the sun, opposites, which reconcile themselves in the life force, which is depicted by a tree.  I'm awfully pleased with the cut itself -- especially since it's my first one.  I hope you can see it.  My next one is going to be a town scene, I think, but I haven't sketched it yet.  It's still in the vague stage & probably will be for awhile yet.  I don't like to "solidify" an  idea too soon, because once it's definite I find it difficult to picture changes in my mind anymore.  Unfortunately, I may not be here for the Festival itself.  (I'd like to be, to see how my things are received) but we may be going to California for 2 weeks beginning Sept. 1st.  (Not that I'm not anxious to do that, too.)  It just would have been nice to do both.  As it stands right now, Linda, my boss, may be able to take my stuff up to Blackfoot for me, so I guess I shouldn't complain!!

I hope we can see enough in 2 weeks to satisfy me.  So far, we're going to Reno first, then S.F. & some wineries, & a day at least to visit my friend Olga in Los Gatos & then down to L.A. & of course to Disneyland (Brook's main reason for wanting to do is to have my picture taken beside Mickey, I think!!)  On the way home, we'd like to stop at Yosemite Nat'l Park, if we have time. Sounds like a hectic 2 weeks to me, but that's all the vacation Brook gets, so...  Can you think of anything we really should see?  I think we're going to drive down the coast on the way to L.A.  I can't wait to see an ocean again!  (& to get in!)

Well, that's about all for now.

P.S.  I don't think I mentioned that my mom is working in my father's office now.  I think it's greate & it seems to be working out really well.  I think they're even closer now than ever & also it's given my mother some much-needed confidence in her own abilities.

April 3, 1977 (Letter from Kathy)

Have the typewriter out to type a letter for Gary, so decided to get a little much needed practicing in on you!!

Gary's out in the garage helping a 14 year old neighbor with his motorcycle.  This kid has pretty neat parents.  The kind I'm sure Gary wishes he would have had sometimes.  Imagine his parents supporting him in his motorcycles and actually standing out in the desert on a freezing windy day to watch -- no way!!  They don't even want to talk about it on the phone.

We are headed for a 170 mile race from Burns to Bend, Oregon on April 16th.

I had a week off in March that coincided with a trip that my neighbor was taking to San Francisco and Sacramento to visit her Mother in a convalescent home.  Gary had no objection to me going. (He planned to lose 5 pounds while I was gone.  It's my fault he's 5-10 pounds overweight because if we weren't' married he wouldn't come home and wind up in front of the TV and could ride his bike every night instead.  How's that for shifting the blame?  We had a good chuckle over that -- especially when he didn't lose any weight while I was gone.)   Anyway, we spent over 20 hours with her Mom that week and got plenty of shopping, eating, driving, and spending in!!!

We'll be glad to see spring arrive for real and for the wind to stop huffing everything 10 houses away.  Not sure how much we will be affected by the drought in the Northwest.  We may be in an area that's unpopulated enough that we may still be able to maintain yards.  Time will tell.

We have a community water system here and the board election comes up May 2.  We really have to put our heads together in this neighborhood to keep out the guys who can profit from being on the board.  I dread the upcoming election.  The neighborhood is split over a dog shooting.  What a mess!!

Thank you for your invitation.  We get one every year from Gary's relatives for their annual July 4th celebration.  If we got home we could party all day!!

Imagine Mardi and Marti would have been a little chocked over twins.  Always thought I'd like to have twins -- but a boy and girl the first time.  Don't expect too much do I?

Gary's job is continuing to go well and mine also.  Think I've got the most progressive dentist in Idaho and if not, certainly the office with the most benefits.  He mellows a little every year as he becomes happier with himself and gives us less static.

We had thought that Gary would get a company car about now, but come to find out that the parts manager has been there 13 years and never offered a car, so Gary just doesn't know now whether he'll get one or not.  We did sell the Corvette back to the guy that we bought it from and Gary has been riding his motorcycle (one of them I should say) to work and on the colder mornings I drop him off.  I still worry a little that maybe he's not sure whether he wants to be there or not, but then other days I think I'm just reading him wrong.  I know he has a lot of responsibility there and pressure.  Thank my lucky stars that I have the job I have with good working conditions, good hours, and good pay.

Glad to hear you are feeling "settled in".  Little surprised too that we haven't gotten a card from some distant or near state, but figured you found your niche.

We did have a neat time in Pa for the holidays.  I really love to visit, but there's not a whole lot that I miss from there.  I love the independence that our location gives us.  Know we never could live in the same town with Gary's parents.  They would drive us to divorce.  Feel now that our marriage is better than it has ever been.  Sometime, I don't remember or how but I expected the fact that Sunday is Gary's day in the desert.  I plan Sunday for myself to do "my" things, even if that means saving the cleaning and cooking.  Actually I've been reading novels, which I can get lost in for days if I let myself.

I can lose myself just as easily in the garden for an afternoon and not even think of it as work -- it's therapy from the routine of the weeks I guess.  It's really neat how we grow.

Gosh, I sure am rattling away.  How come (no, why) -- starting to talk like the farmers -- do I get so thoughtful when I write to you?  I would guess because your letters always seem so thoughtful and get me in the mood.

My boss brought out a load of manure for my garden today.  I offered his son the part I didn't plan to use since they don't have room for one.  Gary and I went food shopping while they rototilled the manure in on their side, came back to find it all done.  Sure thought that was nice.

Kind of looking forward to our 10 year class reunion, sometimes wondering though if I really care what happened to many of them.  It almost made me feel good that I didn't remember Rick Hackett (that doesn't even sound right) when I saw him at the gym at Christmas.  Linda Dies said, "gee, you guys must not look at your yearbook much."  Seems another life away to have gone to high school there.  Wow -- Gary just put the light on.  Guess it was getting dark -- been writing all afternoon.

Enough is enough -- take care.

March 31, 1977 (Letter from Sue)

I know -- it seems unforgivable, doesn't it?  Actually, your guess that I've been plotting my escape to the West is not far wrong.  I was in Calif. for a month and that is the reason you haven't heard from me -- your letter was awaiting upon my return.  I would love to see you again -- the wknd you mentioned, however, I will be again in Calif. (an oral civil service exam for S. Mateo County.)  We'll have to wait til later in the spring.

California was a heady experience.  I always revert to my personality of lazy decadence when I go out.  I was trying my damnedest to coolly & efficiently track down job leads -- but kept getting sidetracked by the pursuit of pleasure.  My friend Sally & I adventured in San Diego one weekend to visit an old flame of hers who is now in the Navy.  I had a most unforeseen, unexpected tryst with another young Naval officer.  I, who have always scoffed at the military. Now I wish I'd plied your sister with questions.  I also managed to burn a few bridges that had been rotting for some time.  I cleaned up my act, in other words.

Speaking of cleaning up one's act -- did I tell you about my adventure w/ E. Baker @ Midwinter?  Obviously not, since you haven't heard from me in 6 months.  We made arrangements to see one another but he again got caught up w/ busy business -- though this time he finally showed.  "Enough" I cried.  What a ridiculous situation.  The only thing that appeals to me about him is his looks -- and also, an aura of energy & power-drive which he exudes.  Otherwise, he's a pretty egotistical cookie, which is OK, I suppose, but I always become too enraged for that type.  I absolutely despise, detest & loathe being either stood up or made to wait an inordinate amount of time.  So I guess my extremely erratic fling with Mr. B has wound down.  It's much better this way -- much more calm & rational for me.

I'm glad you're feeling comfortable w/ your job situation.  It's easy to feel wanderlust after 6 months to a year, but as you deduced, moving on whenever you feel the urge really gets you in very unstable job conditions.  (Unless maybe you're a musician.)  In most jobs, I think one has to "invest" some time in order to move on with clarity.

My job situation is actually fine.  In lots of ways, I should heed those words I wrote in the above paragraph,  If I were to stay @ the library, I'm sure I could advance to whatever I might want.  I like where I'm working now & with whom.  If only this library system were suddenly transported to Calif, everything would be peachy.  But alas -- the grass seems to be greener out there (though w/ the drought, that won't last too long), so I've gotta move along.  I've been away form my family too long.  I'm sure you can understand that feeling.

[By the way, did you read that Rolling Stone article (sometime in Feb.) about 3 strange suicides of the boys in Oil City?  Know anything about that?]

I haven't seen much movie-wise lately except Rock which I found delivered what it promised.  Implausible story, but very uplifting.  I think Sylvester Stallone is my new man -- he has a touch of ironic genius.  I thought he was hilarious @ the Oscars.  Was disappointed in The Last Tycoon.  Thought Bound for Glory was beautiful but too pat & glorified.  The new Tanner film -- Jonah Will Be 25 in the Year 2000 is probably the best thing I've seen in the last 6 mos.  How 'bout you?

Well, Paul -- I hope you've forgiven me.  Let's try to get together some time this spring (before it gets too jungle-like humid).

P.S.  You aren't, by chance, tempted by the glamorous prospect of attending ALA in Detroit???

June 20, 1974 (Letter from Tony)

Now I'm ready to write you a good letter.  My letter-writing was put on hold about 2 months ago as the end of the school year drew near and my creative energy faded away.  My exams were no big thing, but I find law school and the particular social relationships I've developed (or not developed) to be rather stifling.  My response to that is to move into an apartment by myself next year  and work hard first semester and then have only Tuesday and Thursday classes my second and last semester   So much for the distant future. 

Actually the character of events I was involved in in Berkeley was on the upbeat, but my mind set was such that I was not responding as fully as I would like.

I'm now into my annual summer coasting period, this year the place is Walla Walla, Washington.  I'm working with Prison Legal Services in the maximum security prison.  Let me back up a bit so you can grasp the fortuity of the events which led me to Walla Walla.  Before I do that, I'll back up a bit more and tell you about the visit of Michael and Liz.

Just about a month ago I was rushing through my studying as I could be done on the Wednesday before my exams started because that was then M & L were to come.  I had substantially completed my reading when they showed up.  It was really good to see Michael.  His cheerfulness is infectious.  It wasn't quite as good to see Liz.  Although she came across as being friendlier this time than at any other time I have been around here, she still has the knack of making people feel uneasy far too often.

I'm not sure if it's just that she is so incredibly jealous about Michael and anyone else or if she is always this way, even when she and Michael are alone.  I'm more and more convinced that she's always the abrupt, petulant little girl trying to be so serious and often stepping on the toes, unnecessarily, of those around her.

What puzzles me somewhat is why Michael is attracted to her.  Actually I can think of a number of reasons but none of them seem sufficient.

I'm firmly of the opinion that Michael should not marry her, that Liz has been and continues to be the major driving force behind their plans to get married, and her compulsion derives somehow from her Catholic upbringing.

While they were out here, they went to Sausalito to go shopping.  Liz's idea.  They went to a jewelry store to look at rings.  Liz's idea.  There was a $150 ring that fit Michael, although they had previously "decided" not to spend money on wedding rings, it was Liz's idea that Michael buy the ring.  Michael agonized all afternoon, going into the store, walking back to the car, hitting his head again the steering wheel, and then repeating the cycle. In the end Liz won out and Michael bought the ring.

I feel sorry for Michael on their wedding day.  I'm sure her parents are going to press for a major affair.

Michael can bring much happiness to those around him, he deserves someone better suited to his needs than Liz.  Well, I got a little carried away there.  I am still not sure what I should do, I'm tempted to write Michael a letter and explain why I don't think he should get married to Liz.  But that may only offend him, and would surely offend her and the chances of it accomplishing anything are quite slim.  But I think I must, as a friend.

Now then, on to cheerier things.  At lunch one day during exams Bill Chang, a friend and fellow law student, mentioned that he was driving to Seattle because he had a summer job there and he was looking for someone to come along because it's a long ride.  (20 hours by car.)  I like the idea of seeing Oregon and Washington so I said I'd like to.  We left on June 2, and had a very fine drive up.

For all my time in California I have been bothered by the weather, the rain and fog and cold in the winter and the lack of rain during the summer were just too unlike Buffalo and Colden for me to appreciate.  One day I asked Molly, a woman who lived in the same house I was living in, how she could stand the grass dying and the hills turning brown in the summer.  She looked surprised and said "I always thought they turned golden."  Oh wow.

Anyway, on my way up north I finally was able to take in the beauty of the hills and the dark green oak greets and the clear blue sky.  It certainly is what's "natural" there even if it didn't meet my expectations.

We drove up near the coast through Oregon and Washington.  The Coastal range reminded me of the Appalachians back East.  Extremely pretty, green tree-covered, gentle hills and mountains.

It was raining when we drove into Seattle.  And it continued for the next two days.  Bill was a big glum about moving to a city where he knew no one and he was a bit apprehensive about his job.  I decided that Seattle might be a decent place to live for a summer and I knew I would enjoy living with Bill.

I went to the placement office at the Univ of Wash law school and could find only one interesting sounding job, with Prison Legal Services.  I was eligible for work-study and they wanted someone on work study.  So I called them up, they said come in this afternoon for an interview and I did and they said you've got a job if you want it but the first part of the summer you'll have to go to Walla Walla.  I thought about that overnight.  Bill went to work that day and found the job to be quite easy with several very nice people working there.  And we had found him a fine studio apartment.  That plus the fact that Walla Walla sounded like it was quite different from any place I've ever lived led me to accept the job.  I was to fly to Walla Walla the next day with one of the attorneys coming to Walla Walla for some big thing.

That evening Bill and I went up the space needle just before sunset.  Mt. Rainier, even though it was 90 miles away, was huge and snow-covered.  The Olympic Mountains, quite substantial ones to my surprise, were between Seattle and the ocean and it was over them that the sun set.  It was just tremendous.

The next morning I flew from Seattle on Cascade Airlines.  Cascade is smaller than Mohawk was.  It schedules no flights on Saturday   0.  Walla Walla has been very pleasant and relaxing.  It's well irrigated and has trees but not much in the way of excitement.  I flew back to Oakland to get my clothes etc.  While I was there I scoured all the used book stores in Berkeley and bought 4 of the books you recommended.  So far I've read A Cool Million and What I'm Going to Do I Think.  I liked the early chapters of A Cool Million, it got to be a bit too much after that.  The second book I enjoyed very much.  He was able to capture many of the emotions I've felt but never have heard described.  The other two are At Play in the Fields of the Lord and The Journal of Albion Moonlight.  I'll be working here until Aug 10th or so, then head back to Colden, Columbus, Pittsburgh, Albany, Boston, and New York.  I'm thinking of getting an Ameripass from Greyhound, I could travel by bus for 1 month.  It costs $189 and would get me back and forth and all around.  Let me know when you graduate and where you'll be between Aug 10th and Sept 1.  See you soon.

June 9, 1974 (Letter from Michael)

It's taken me a while to write back, but here I am.  Today was so damned hot, above 90.  It is still hot now -- 10pm.  As I sit here writing sweat is running down my arms and face, so if any smears appear in this letter it will not be tears.  Rather it will be the sweat that comes from toiling over a rough assignment such as this letter.

You know I always worry when writing letters to English majors or the like?  I get nervous that my speling may not be correct, or punctuation: or that my word usage may not be well or grammer. Library students frighten me even more.  Probably a great number of English majors would never know there was anything wrong with my writing, but librarians would know where to look to find out.

Well enough with the serious stuff, now with the bullshit.  (But first it should be noted that I am not stoned, high, or anything else, just very hot.)  Elizabeth and I are getting married.  (Do you want to check that last sentence over again?)  Yes, it's true.  Sept 1.  We just decided the end of April. We're very content with each other and are determined to come to terms w/ our fantasies. Actually we love each other enough but more practically and realistically are the financial advantages, i.e. taxes, insurance, presents, etc.  And also it makes it a bit easier to plan a future together.  Not that I am trying to rationalize the situation.  We do love each other and have come to the realization and decision that we could be most happy with each other.  (My brother, always one to look to for support in trying times said, "So why ruin a good friendship?")

In any event Liz's parents are ecstatic that we are headed out of a relationship of sin and into one of morality and legitimacy.  The event takes place as I said on Sept 1 in her back yard in Spring Valley, N.Y.  It's to be a casual affair, casual dress, good food and drink, and a good time.  We were going to do the ceremony ourselves but the prevailing opinion determined that it should be someone "official", hence my uncle who's a N.Y. State Supreme Court Judge.  You're invited even if you can't come, but I hope you can.  (Their house is just 20 minutes outside of New York City.) Tony expects to be able to come.

Which brings up another subject -- our trip to California.  We had a great time.  First went to Palm Springs to see my grandparents, then went to L.A. and Farmer's Market.  We had a rented car and drove up the coast to Frisco.  What a beautiful, fantastic drive!  (I suppose you know all about it.)  Took about 2 days to do that, stopping along the way, staying over, taking a tour of the Heart Castle at San Simeon.  That was an incredible place.  An example of obnoxious, flaunted American wealth, at the same time very beautiful and very well put together.  (Ah, some day it will belong to the people.) 

We spent 3 days in San Francisco with Tony taking us all over the place.  We had a good, fun time there.  Tony was fine and we were both glad to see each other.

Now we are back with the "post-vacation blues", back to work and reality.  The store has been doing relatively well, that means better, but I am still in debt thanks to my brother.  But I've halved it.  It was about $6,000 now it's about $3,000.  So before when I used to wake up twice in the middle of the night to remind myself, now I get up only once.

6/12/74 - Hi, back again.  So what's up with you?  Are you going to Manhasset?  Write back as soon as you can. I hope we can get together over the summer.

September 21, 1973 (Letter from Chris)

Receiving your letter this morning was almost frighteningly coincidental.  Only last night I saw Paul Rosen while at work.  He was in the Sign of the Steer for a salad and stayed long enough to watch the Riggs-King tennis match.  I only had a few minutes to talk to him since I was working upstairs, and he was at the bar downstairs.  He told me he was living on Long Island and looking for a job.  I mentioned that I hadn't seen you and was wondering what you were doing.  He asked about Tony and I couldn't offer any information.  Then we spoke of Kenny and Lauren, briefly.

It is funny you should feel the same way about Kenny and Lauren as I do.  They are both good people -- but I guess I don't see them as a married couple.  I am surprised that I feel the way I do -- that is, being hurt that I wasn't invited to the wedding.  Tony, you, Herb, Eric, Linda -- and I'm sure Liz and all of Lauren's girlfriends from State.  Not that I could have gone -- but it would have been a nice gesture of him to invite me.  The more I think of it -- the more ashamed I am of myself for feeling this way - -but I do feel it.

On top of this thought is the thought just relayed to me when I called home today -- that Judi Haberman just got married to an old friend of mine.  I know they were going to, but just hearing of it and about how swanky the whole thing was makes me sick.  (Perhaps it's jealousy -- and that's what really scares me.)  For some reason I think of Judi often and though I've had several girlfriends and lived with a handful of women since her -- I can't seem to forget her like I have the rest.  Hell -- I can't even remember what Liz looks like.  Yes -- those 3 years at 4028 Bailey Avenue were real fairy tale years -- my whole 4 years at UB were like that.  And now here I am -- in real life -- a worthless piece of shit -- stagnating in a job with little intellectual satisfaction.  All the people I ever knew and were close to are doing something -- (even if it's getting married -- at least they're happy -- or think they are.)  I know I'm not happy. 

And often the thought comes to me of how I've gone and lost some good friends.  Herb is foremost in my mind -- but even you and Kenny were close to me and at one point I felt I knew all of you.  Now I wonder if either of them would even know me if they passed me on the street.  As far as Eric and Linda go -- all I can say (when I'm not laughing) is that they deserve each other.  What more can one say about two people who you know will be absolutely the same when they are 80 years old and living in Miami.

I don't know if you are aware of what I'm doing now -- but it's the same thing I've been doing since I finished school.  I am the assistant manager of Sign of the Steer Restaurant on Main St. down from UB.  I am also the Head Bartender which can be taken either one of two ways.  I've been here since last Oct 4 when I returned to Buffalo to live with Judi and found out that she didn't want it that way anymore.  So that makes it almost a year now that I've been here and maybe soon I'll need a vacation.  Toward the end of June I decided I couldn't take Buffalo any longer, so I gave notice.  So -- I packed up and split cross-country with a girl I had been seeing. UCLA so I decided she was a good excuse to move to L.A. see some of the good old USA.  It was a big mistake -- the trip was nice -- and there is some beautiful country here -- but the big towns are all the same, and people don't change.  L.A. was really a drag, and when I couldn't find a job and had to pay $240/month for an unfurnished 2 BR apt. -- I decided that it just wasn't the right time to be there.  So I came back to Buffalo and got my job back.  I stayed with a girl I had been seeing before I left and we went to find an apartment together.  So now here we are, Cheri and myself in a real nice, cozy (small) place on Lisbon right off of Bailey (across from Mueller's Delicatessen).

I sure hope you can get down here some time.  We could sit and reminisce, in case you are interested we do have a phone (unlisted) 716-833-9661.

Now that we are writing -- let's try to keep it up.

I'd write more now -- but it's time for me to get to work and I want to get this off to you today.  Take care and keep your head together.

June 30, 1973 (Letter from Leslie)

Greetings dear friend!  This week has been really busy.  Dad and I couldn't finish the taping in time for the whole room to be finished so Mom said okay, no more, we will finish it when Robin goes.  So we painted the floor and moved the furniture back in.  Mom painted the woodwork (it's a mint green that looks good enough to eat and the walls will be the same color) and put u the summer curtains so it looks all of a piece and really nice in spite of the unfinished walls.

Robin and Barbara arrived Wednesday night about 2am.  What can I say, it's really nice seeing him and having him around for awhile.  It has been almost three years since Rob and I have been in the house at the same time.  Barb is great and has been and is really good for Rob because he looks fine, happy, and peaceful.  We were all prepared to like her and now we know how great she is.

Surprise, surprise -- Rob and Barb have asked me to come back to California with them and the family says I can go!  Wow, I'm going to California!  I will ride out with them in Rob's car and fly home probably sometime in August.  I plan to buy film for my camera on Monday and do all my necessary errands such as having a physical to send to Albany so I can register.  More on this later.

Last night Blood Sweat the Tears was at Saratoga with Curtis Mayfield.  I had wanted to see it, but didn't have tickets, so I didn't go.  It was pouring rain as it has everyday and night since Rob and Barb got here and therefore it was no advantageous to sitting on the lawn.  This morning there was a review and I'm glad I didn't go.  BS&T had trouble with the sound system and so that messed them up cause nobody could understand the singer plus they were rather lackluster so said the reviewer.  Curtis Mayfield didn't show at all -- his plane was delayed along the line, but his band was there and went on without him.  For another concert he was late so it sounds as if he is trying for a reputation of reliability.

Thursday I went to the movies with Marc, Bernie, and Doug to see the newest James Bond flick "Live and Let Die".  Title song by Paul and Linda McCartney.  I found parts of the film really funny and enjoyed the chase scenes, but it did have serious flaws that one should realize.  The main flaw was that it was racist and used stereotypes to depict the blacks.  The plot has to do with a new heroin supply and its distribution.  The black "dude" stereotype is used quite a bit and distributing night clubs are called "Fillet of Soul".  There are also some scenes on the island where the poppies being grown showing voodoo ceremonies.  Of course the movie was chauvinist and Bond always get his women.  Some of the gimmicks were incredible such as Bond's watch that could produce a powerful magnetic field that would deflect bullets but the worst was when one of the villains was blown up like a balloon with a compressed air pellet and burst.  It was the first time I had seen a James Bond film in the movies.  Roger Moore played Bond instead of Sean Connery.

Monday 2:July '73 -- Hello again.  A friend of my brother's gave him the biggest piece of hash I have ever seen so he and I smoked some last night.  Barb doesn't smoke because she falls asleep.  It was nice -- very cheerful stuff, but I don't think it was that strong -- I don't know, haven't smoke hash in a long time.

The picnic was fun once we finally left the house and got under the way.  The sun did come out and it was really hot.  I went swimming a couple of times.  There was lots of food, but I didn't eat too much -- trying not to be a pig.  I just love riding on the water in a boat, really relaxing.  There's quite a few sailboats and a couple of canoes, both of which I have never ridden in, and both of which I would like to.  Canoeing looks like such a peaceful way to travel and quiet.  I definitely have to go canoeing sometime.

On the radio I am listening to WGY with Ellen.  It is an enjoyable program.  Oh yes -- you wanted to know if the station was like that all of the time or if it was special program -- well it's a special program on Monday-Friday or Saturday from midnight to 5am.  The rest of the programming is much, much more conservative.

Rob tuned up my motorcycle and adjusted the clutch so she was running really sweet.  So I called my friend Chris and asked her if she wanted to go for a ride.  It was/is a really pleasant night for riding -- not cold, slightly humid, and not windy.  The air felt very soft.  We rode about an hour and a half around various local roads -- I felt like Easy Rider just cruising along.

Today I went to Albany to fill out an application to work part-time in the fall -- I hope I will be able to.  Walking to the library I became excited looking at the people and thinking of the new people I would meet and how it is a new environment to go to school in.  I talked to my advisor and made out a tentative schedule. Pre-registration is July 23-27 and I don't know if I will be back from California for that or not.  Otherwise I register on August 24 and am in the second to last group and get what I can take. I don't' know when I'm coming back from Cal.  And I don't know what is the best to do.

Whew -- I just keep yawning so I'm signing off for now.  Good night, sleep tight, don't let the bed bugs bite.

Tuesday 3:July '73 -- Hello -- I've been doing some more thinking on California -- the decision to go was easy but my decision not to go was/is hard.  I've told all kinds of people that I was going but anyway why am I not?  Well one of the reasons is/will be going by myself with Rob and Barb.  They will be working during the day so I will be on my own which would be okay for a few days but then I like to have company when I go to see things.  Plus their apartment is small so not much privacy for them or me.  Other big reason is money -- I just don't have the money to spend freely because of no job and my parents are not able to provide at this time and that would be in my mind so with heavy heart, but also with the optimism which says I will get out there sometime, I have decided not to go.

I plan to pre-register on the 23rd, the first day in the morning.  When I talked with my advisor and had made up one schedule but I want to switch it around so that I have no  classes on Monday and Friday -- want to talk to my advisor about how it is having two classes on one day, twice a week.  Class meets only once a week.  More on this later.

Oh -- I forgot to mention that I sold my motorcycle for $750 today!  Wow I thought I would be stuck with it.  This morning I paid my insurance premium and had it inspected and this afternoon this woman who is a friend of one of my mother's friends came by with Rick (my brother's friend) and bought it and took it home.  So I quick called to cancel the insurance and have to turn in my plates.

Will continue later.

Friday 6:July '73 -- Greetings.  I'm going to mail this today so I'm going to finish up.   Yesterday I bought Get Off in Chicago for $1.99 an am very happy to have it in my possession.  Today I want to buy Jack Bruce Songs for a Tailor also $1.99 and Larry Coryell's Offering at the usual price.  I got Gary Burton Quartet Duster out of my library because I saw Coryell's name.  Haven't listened to it yet.  Will discuss in more detail later.  Take care of yourself.

February 26, 1973 (Letter from Kenny)

Where do I begin?  How do you tall about a roommate who loved books, and Gleason's, and sleeping and me?  Alas, poor Nelson, I knew him, Horatio.

In any event, here I am.  I know I haven't written and I know you're probably pissed as hell, witnessed by the fact that you write Herb before me and your letters are un-Nelson like short; but please forgive me, I've lost all touch with reality.  How the fuck are you?  It sounds like  you really know what you're doing in wanting to go to grad school, but your exit from the West Coast was to say the least surprising.  I probably will be speaking with you shortly, within the week, so don't be too surprised to hear from me.  How is Tony?  I haven't heard from him at all and when you write him perhaps you could give him my address to write because he always was smarter than me an could study less.

To recap my life for the past 2-3 months is not too difficult.  I have been working and worrying myself to death.  I had finals from Jan 18-22 (3 of them) and for about 2 weeks before that I couldn't eat or sleep and lost about 10 lbs and ended up weighing 179, which for me is outrageous.  They were more than words can describe yet they showed me how stupid exams are because they don't test anything.  You get an hour on a question, which is just a bunch of facts and you're supposed to pick out the issues and write about them, so often you know the stuff but don't see it and it is presumed you never knew nit, it's really fucked up.  Anyhow, my Xmas vacation of 2 1/2 weeks was spent in the library preparing for them so I have nothing to report on that score.  After exams they were nice enough to give us 6 whole days off, so I went to Buffalo and saw Lauren.  It was terrific, I never realized how nice old UB would be until you go somewhere and break you hump only to return and see kids hanging out in Norton again. You had exited some weeks previous, I saw Maddy and I guess I didn't miss Tony by a whole lot either.  I saw Chris for the 1st time in 6-7 months and I'm glad to report that some things in the world will always remain as they are; although I must admit it was good seeing him and talking to him.  Now it's back to work and more of it because the next 2 weeks are to be the worst yet because I have some legal research paper to do.  Enough about that.

What are you plans for the coming months?  Will you be here over the summer?  Perhaps Herb and I will come to Warren sometime in June or so.  Herb by the way is doing fine, I don't see him often but talk to him quite a bit.  He's seeing some local girl and he's pretty happy and no longer a virgin.  (I hate to break it to you this way, big guy.)  I saw Eric a few weeks ago and he is just as young and ridiculous as ever, worrying about how his life was washed up at 20 because he hated his job.  I told him to quit (it had never occurred to him) and he did and now is somewhat happier at a new place.

How long were you in Calif before you decided to leave?  Did you ever get to New Orleans like you wanted to?  It's funny I was going to call you tonight (Sunday) but all of a sudden I realized that not only was it late (after 12) but that it was SUNDAY NIGHT and I didn't want the phone to disturb anyone!  Anyhow, I got very nostalgic while in Buffalo and realized how happy I was there and how few things I actually had to worry about, though at the time, it seemed insurmountable; so now my motto is "this too shall pass" and I keep saying it to myself constantly.  I haven't listened to the radio in ages so I know of no new songs and a couple weeks ago I went home for the weekend and saw "Heartbreak Kid" which was the first movie I had seen since August.  It was pretty good but got me depressed thinking about getting married, which should be quite a change to say the least.  Anyhow before I start rambling on, it is now 1:00 and I have to get up early tomorrow, so let me stop here and continue when I speak to you soon.  Write and let me know what night is best to call.

October 29, 1972 (Letter from Mardi)

I'm actually going to try and write on non-lined paper.  I never was a "swave" letter writer.

Good to hear that you're truckin straight out to California.  It's very simple, if you do get down and out, you're somewhere you can't bitch because it's your climate and your choice.  I never once hated good old Minneapolis although I've been not too thrilled with the winter, but I have to have a winter.  There are some real weirdo's still around!  It keeps me in good bitching form!

I was talking to my mother Saturday and she mentioned to me if I knew if you would be home at Christmas time.  But I didn't know.  Anyway, she wanted me to ask you if you are going to be home after school, the 15th, for Christmas and all, and if you are stopping in Minneapolis on your way to California, if she could ride out here with you.  Just a thought.   Then we could both fly to Florida together and she'd like that.

Today I am relaxing my body from a party last night.  WOWIE!  The old annual Halloween party -- Bill and I went really original this year!  Football player -- me -- and the devil -- oh, Bill says to "go to hell" and when you're there he'll see you.  Yuck yuck.  God it was one of the best parties I've ever been to.  Owen and Mel, and some other guys, I don't think you know, have a mansion on Irving Ave around the Guthrie and Walker area, how they got it I'll never know.  But this place is huge and about 150 people showed up and a couple of kegs and a few hits and everyone was so fine.  Glad I wasn't there this morning though.

Mom was telling me Dody and his family have sold everything in Warren and moved to Buffalo.  Mr. DeLong apparently being transferred.  She said something about Dody and grad school, but I have mislaid the letter.

I must close, I'm trying to get through "The Cancer Ward".  It's been sitting on my book shelf for over a year.  I picked up a couple of books for a quarter a piece -- 2 from the "Alexandria Quartet" and a book about She that I've wanted.

Take care and tell me about Xmas.  Hope to see ya.

October 26, 1972 (Card and note from Art)

Good to hear from you.   Sorry I did not write sooner but been busy.  Moved up to Lakewood to be close to school and have found myself overwhelmed with  booking.  I'm glad I'm going with one chick helps keep your sanity without worrying about getting dates.  I'm living with a minister which is a story in itself but it is working out remarkably well.  Cottage slowed down unbelievably after you left.  I'm glad I left within two weeks thereafter.  I have since tried to get a hold of Tom but when I mailed a letter to where he was supposed to be, it was returned saying he never lived there.  Sorry I forgot your last name but I did not have trouble remembering your birthday -- have a good one.

October 9, 1971 (Letter from Mrs. P)

Paul I want you to know I have been thinking of you, even though I don't write.  How are you?  Working real hard I know.  I hear your are working in a restaurant as a cook.  How do you like it?  I have been real busy at work.  We are getting ready for Xmas.   Just think it's a little over 2 mos away.

Have you heard from Mike?  I got a letter fro him and he seems to be doing OK.  I guess he had a bad cold there for awhile, but is much better now.  He said he lost some weight.  He is so thin now, I hope he doesn't lose anymore weight.

I had my wisdom tooth pulled last week and I swear he pulled my tonsils because my throat and neck were so sore, but it's much better now.

The weather is beginning to turn cold and damp and the leaves are turning their beautiful colors.  In c couple weeks they should be real pretty.  Just think after that will come that white stuff.  You lucky guy enjoying the sun.  Will you be home for Xmas?  It seems most of the kids will be home.  I'm planning on Mardi being home.

Bill Anderson and Bill Peterson (a friend of Bill's out of the Navy) came east for a 2 wk trip and spent a couple of days with me and then they went non to Boston.  They took Barb L. with them.

Tina really had a beautiful wedding.  Her husband seems to be a nice guy.  Mike and I both went.  It seems all I've been doing is going to wedding this summer.  Fine in all.

I'm sending you a snapshot of you kids when Mardi was home in July.  I don't think you saw them.

Paul take good care of yourself and let me know how things are out there in good old Calif.  Write when you get time and my thoughts are with you.  Till I hear from you.  Always a friend and Mardi's mother.

October 8, 1971 (Letter from Barb Lucia)

I'm living in the slums again in my usual October unemployed state -- how is the ocean, sunshine and restaurant life??  Seems to be my forte -- working at the ocean -- the only time I'm ever content -- duh!  Nothing like living in fantasyland all the time.  Maybe Renee was right-- we do live in a dream world.

Anderson drove me back to Boston!  He and another guy came to Warren and stayed at Mardi's house and ate her ravioli -- she was happy, needless to say, about staying in Msp and work!  We started out for Boston one bright sunny day (last Thurs) and ended up spending the nite in Niagara Falls w/ two bombed guys on my hands -- trying to get them up to the room plus sneaking Harry in unobtrusively -- I'm there, duh, what in the hell am I doing in Niagara Falls?!

They stayed here for 2 days -- having a fantastic time w/ no refrigerator, no music, etc.  We were just putting the place together again and had no stereo or radio plus Anderson got stuck w/ getting a U-haul and going out to get our new refrigerator.  He is really nice sometimes, you know?

So here I am -- my head is completely turned around since I left here in July -- seems like 3 years not 3 months.  Since living on the Vineyard, I am so alienated from this kind of life and here I thought I had outgrown these sudden changes of heart (?)  I feel exactly as if I'm living in Warren ,Pa and can't get out!  Not that I mind living in Boston but just the day-to-day shit plus it is so ugly around her e-- I can't explain how I feel -- but yet there's no sense in moving around the goddamn county every 3 months forever -- they ought to lock me up somewhere!  Also am at a loss because it seems I have a job back at old Mass Mental but no salary because of the money freeze, state govt, etc.  Right now I am typing for a guy at Mass Men for $3/yr until this job is done, probably another week.  Hey, I do have a good job.  Enough of such shit -- I had a great 6 weeks of August/Sept -- BIG DEAL -- and now it's over ok -- what are you doing?  Duh!  Mardi and I were talking about this the other nite -- how I got to live at M. Vineyard and have fun in the sun and all that but now I have nothing and she stayed in one place and didn't get to go anywhere but she has everything she needs as far as security goes, etc. -- and we decided that no one is really getting anywhere!  As if there's somewhere to get to -- and there's Sue Smith in Warren thinking that we're so neat because we don't live there but of course we're not neat or cool or whatever -- and everyone sits around envying you because you're in California but they don't think about the hassles with money and a place to stay and no security and all that -- they don't understand that you're just living, wherever you are!  Place has little to do with it.  Although sunshine and peace can let you feel content no matter what your hassles are.  Are you having a quiet time nowadays?  If you're doing a lot of acid, etc. you're not exactly in the place I mean?  Remember my ex-old man from last year who came to Boston last October fresh from tripping his little heart out constantly in California full of love and peace, brother -- I saw him in September and he has lot all his sunshine ways I fear an dis now completely hard-core city -- screw your brother!  God, people are weird!  (Far-out, freaky, and not least of all -- groovy.)  You'll have to see what going back to Buffalo does to your head in January -- believe me, it'll be strange.  And of course, we'll see you at Christmas in Warren -- hey, something new.  Did you know that Don Corey got married last Saturday?!  Far out?  Thought I'd throw that in for old times sake -- so did Marti Graves and of course Tina and Mark -- Joan is going back to Clarion in January.  That's it for the news that makes the news.  Mardi and Bill -- that famed financial wonder -- both ran out of money at the same time -- him in Philly and her in Msp.  She had to send him his paycheck and I had to send her $10 to make it though the week -- amazing, truly amazing.  Here I sit with no car, no stereo, No TV, no car-stereo tapes, etc. sending money to Msp.  They have everything you could possibly want -- except xtra money.  Hey, we're all clean.

Switch to the local news -- you know that Doreen and John are getting married in December -- she's moving out next Friday into their new place in New Hampshire and I am freaking out -- I can't imagine living here and not living with Doreen.  Nancy lives here now -- I don't know if you've met her -- she's going to nursing school now and studies all week long - I am going to be really lonely this year!

Sat. nite.  Hi there-- I just got back from work -- I went to type a couple hours tonite -- every little bit counts!  I stopped by at the hospital to chat with Bill, the security guard.  This is his C.O. job and I swear he's the only person in the world who reads more than you do -- a book a night is his average since all security guards do is sit there all night.  His dream is to go to the Adirondacks and write a novel.  Why do I know such weird people -- not weird, just different?  Well Paul, what are you doing right now -- 11:00 p.m. -- Sat nite -- working -- right?  I hope we all can actually carry on a conversation when you come home.  Mrs. P said to be sure and say hello -- I think she worries about you!  Now why would anybody worry about you!  Duh!  I even worry!  Take care and write -- see you soon.

September 27, 1971 (Letter from Mardi)

Happy to find your letter in my mailbox tonight!  Thanks for such a fast response!  These Monday nights are bad and your letter was just a neato keen surprise.  Lately I feel like the "Orphan of the Storm" or something!  Ah, poor Mardi.  "That's life" I know!  Work, go to school, work, go to school -- how do people do it?

Glad to hear you'll be going back to school and that you got the $620.00.  You definitely have to stop here on you way back or I won't forgive you!

Anderson left the morning for the New England states!  Wouldn't you know he'd get to Boston before me?  He should be calling here before too long, I'm dying to see how far they got.  He went with another guy so with the both of them driving they should make good time.  Jealous?  Not much!

(9/28/1971)  Hello again!  Sorry I didn't finish that piece.  Sue Smith called me with a few greetings.  She told me to be on the look out for this guy she knew that I had met when I was home the last time.  He's suppose to be on a business trip to Minneapolis and I told him he could look me up (SURE!) so I gave him my wrong phone number and address and no name.  He wanted me to get him some hash.  This guy is "Joe Cool" if I ever saw a "Joe Cool".  He's about 42 and from Warren or something.  He's probably a nark.  What a creep!  She said Barb was going back to Boston tomorrow, so she may see Anderson after all!  The ding never did call last night.  I was really freaking out here last night about 1am.  I got really scared when I'm lying in bed!  My mind goes wild with all this crap from every horror movie I've ever seen!!!  I even moved the shelves in front of the hall door and put the living room chair in front of the living room door!  Why I'm so scared I'll never know!  I've never gotten this spastic before.  Anderson is hardly ever around anyway!  It must be psychological. So I'm a big chicken.

Well I had better close and get my tiny butt? in gear!  I've got to go and pay my telephone bill, a mere $60!!!!  Anderson was happy to say the least.  I swear that's the last of those long distance phone calls for at least 2 months.  I get all screwed up with the bill!  When I pay the bill I figure I'm all paid up and owe nothing, only to remember that there are calls on the next bill that have been made since the last bill was sent.  Duh.  Anderson and I are so budget conscious.

Take care, watch out for those "city women", dress warm, say your prayers, and watch out for bad dope -- SHITTY!

Enclosed are various paraphernalia, not to mention completely useless!  TAA DAA!

One comb for those long golden lock!

A jiffy bookmarker to find your place in any book, or newspaper!

A pack of "fast lite" matches for those hard to light roaches!

Can ther ereally be more? that anyone would want?

September 25, 1971 (Letter from Kenny)

Sorry I haven't written but with coming back to school and getting everything set up I really haven't have had a shitload of time, as a matter of fact all I've been doing lately has been working.

I hope you're doing ok in old sunny Laguna Beach.  Just remember the old tropical Buffalo where the temperature is expected to drop to below 50 tonite and frost.  How's the restaurant business?  I got your letter a long time ago (sorry, again) and it sounds like you really had an incredible trip out there.  

I got up to school on the nite of the 7th.  My room was a fuckin' mess but I was too tired to clean up at all.  Naturally I was almost ruined trying to sleep on my $30 mattress for 2 nites.  I came across a 3/4 bed for $30 (3/4 of a double).  It's a real good one for the price and gives me a shitload more room.  Anyhow classes started on the 9th and all of the courses I originally registered for I eventually dropped and picked up new ones.  I'm taking 3 business courses and a Soc Sci College course (Law and Repression).  I have 0 classes on Friday which is pretty good but all my courses are double periods.  I originally registered for a course in Health Phys Ed and Recreation dept called Basketball Coach with old Len Sufristini.  It was really great, 2 credits, 1 nite a week for an hour and a half.  Then the second week the fuckheads said an undergrad couldn't get credit for it because it was a grad course.  All of the people in the class (8) were phys ed teachers in Buffalo schools. Shit, you should have seen the way they looked at me when I walked in the first week.

Chris is working a few nights at Sizzle Steak.  You should see him, really funny.  He's trying to be a freak, wearing overalls and letting his hair grow into a semi-Afro.  He's a real schmuck.  Herb is working about 4 nites at the computer center and sending out applications for grad schools.  Tony is working a lot at Sunshine House, taking 4 credits of Indep Study (really killing himself, sleeping till 3PM) he's got a Polak girlfriend, Chris, who's really nice.

I'm taking the Law Boards Oct 17 and I'm shitting in my pants already.  Something tells me I'm not going to go where I want because of that asshole test.

The fuckin Dodgers are sinking slowly but I guess you hear all about that in sunny Calif., but at least Aaron is having a good year.

Tony wrote a letter to Columbia Records telling them that you moved and left no forwarding address.  I told them that you were convicted to rape and are serving 20-life in SingSing and that all future correspondence be sent to you there.

Tony had put all of your records and stuff into the basement.  I decided they'd warp down there (I'm so nice) so I brought them upstairs and have most of them in my room.  (I hope you don't mind.)  I wrote your name on all of them, (some are in Tony's room) so none should get lost.  I haven't even had a chance to play them because my stereo is very temperamental and has decided not to work.

What happened with your stereo and the insurance company?  I hope you got money for it.  Do you need any of your stuff sent to you out there?  What else is going on?  Let me know.

Oh well, enough bullshit for now, write soon and let me know what the hell you're doing.

September 18, 1971 (Letter from Ralph and Al)

Well I guess you just said to yourself I'm having a good time so fuck everything else, fuck school I'm staying where I am and I'm going to dig and I really hope you still are digging whatever you're doing and I wish you the best of luck in hoping everything goes just great for you.  (Amen)

Right now Ralph, Tom and myself are back into the old swing of school and I myself am not digging it at all but c'est la vie because I don't have the balls to do what you did you sly bastard Nelson.  Anyhow after this year no more school for this kid for awhile.  Maybe a return to Europe which was really a fine trip.

Just to make you feel a little bit nostalgic, I'll describe a few bits about good old Buffalo.  Our apartment is cheap but the landlord sucks and he lives downstairs.  The other day the old buzzard came up and tacked a list of rules on the kitchen wall including no girls overnight then he told us no stereo after 9:00pm and no "niggers": over.  Too fucked up.  School's still the same I don't think it changed a bit since last year.  We found a way to call anywhere in the country for free so send me your phone number if you have one.  Anyhow send me a letter because I'd like to find out if you get this letter and I'd like to hear form you.  If you forget the address is 251 Jewett Avenue.

I'm still a vegetarian freak and Ralph I think is heading that way too.  I still haven't indulged in the evil weed although it might become necessary soon.  I might also proudly say that I haven touched a cigarette either.

What else?  Perhaps a word of advice and wisdom from the great seer and prophet mystical fucked up yogi maharishi, me.  As you ramble through life brother whatever maybe your goal keep your eye upon the donut and not upon the hold, but don't take that too seriously for the donut maybe stale and the hole nice and sweet.  A little abstract thought I felt like adding.  You know symbolic philosophy and anyhow I thought it sounded good.

And now a word from Ralph.

Greetings!  Blind Faith on the grammophone, right now.  Marmul and I sitting around doing next to nothing cause ain't got no car to split for Poverty Hill - remember that tract of land that Student Assn. bought south of here.  Had a good summer at Chautauqua -- good people, good times, and good payola.  In room $ something in 4230 Ridge Lea, there's some dude named Doctor Ono.   You'll never guess his real name.  No hit.  Dr Ono is alive and well in Buffalo.  Was able to register for photography for non-art majors -- I'm finally excited about a course -- after 4 years.  If this weren't' my last year, I would have packed in school.  The two weeks between the end of my summer job and the first day of classes were really soul-searching.  I actually came close to thumbing out West or flying east to Europe. Buffalo's the same old shithole -- just as easy to get into a rut, altho I'm confident that I'll be able to avoid that predicament.  Photography should help -- I have enough equipment to set up a darkroom her e-- so once I learn enough in the course, I'll have a very enjoyable pursuit to keep me going.  I'm really looking forward to it.  Seeing old friends this year has been good.  Many people have changed over the summer but I guess that's only normal.  My summer had the effect on me of making me blase and nonchalant and non-caring about even more, pretty things -- a lot of my uptightness has diminished and disappeared.  Runnin' lo on paper.  Tom isn't here right now (he's in Batavia), but he'll drop you a line soon.  Keep in touch.

September 9, 1971 (Letter from Barb Lucia)

Howdy -- you fucker!  What in the hell are you doing????  Don't you know that living at the beach is all a fantasy -- life that's only good for a little while -- believe me I know and don't I know that's why I'm the dud I am now!  So hep me Nelson, if you do what I did I'll kill you!  I feel like it's my kid or something...really, "what are you going to do?" -- GIANT QUOTES around that question.  When I first heard you were in California I was home -- in Warren Pa 16365 -- I went home for a week -- my mother had an operation -- she has cancer and they had to remove her breast -- it was really heavy for them, so I had to go home for the week.  So I casually call up your house to see where you're living in Buffalo -- I'm there -- California??  Then Mardi tells me you're staying there.  Well, what can I say?  Paul -- how can you, of all people, quit school?  You are the original enjoyer of school --I've never known anyone to enjoy it and get more out of it than you do -- when I quit I knew it would be a wasted  year for me to go on, but for you I don't see it that way.  Anyway, maybe I'm worrying all for naught -- why don't you write and tell me -- I'll only be here on the island till Sunday, then back to Boston and home for a few weeks to help my mother out.  So write to me at home -- OK?

The summer here ended as suddenly as if someone shut it down for the season.   Labor Day was everyone's last day at work and boom -- everything closed and everyone went back to where they came from.  Now the roads are deserted and we are just wondering what to do with the days until we go.  It's like country time -- we have gone through changes in our house lately -- Woodstock II has arrived -- everyone wanting just a place to be and music to listen too -- our house is it.  I can't explain the latest hassles but I will when I see you.  Why in hell can't people get along -- even people that you like you can't get along with anymore.  People are such fucking assholes to each other -- our time here-- I mean on the island -- is so short -- why can't we be generous.  Shit.  Time anywhere is fucking short -- it always seems that it will last forever until all at once you're remembering it.  Mardi told me she was coming here and then I got a letter that she's not and guess why -- no $$$.  Now what the hell kind of fucking excuse is that but with Mardi and Bill it's true.  So I didn't answer to call -- so she called me last night and we talked about all this shit.  There were 10 million people here-- 5 million of whom no one in the house knew and I couldn't talk really freely on the phone -- it's so rare you get to talk freely now-a-days -- it used to be you did it very day of your life!  Everyone's grown up!  I'm also running out of paper -- what am I babbling about?  Hey, I got a letter from Joan today.  Her life is like a fucking soap opera -- she moved on on Freddy -- she said she got drunk and tried to kill him (?) -- but they're together now and all is well.  Did you get all that?  She is also going back to Clarion in January and the government is paying for it.  If that marriage makes it, it will be all Joan's doing -- I hope she can do it!  And Mardi and Bill are not making it together either -- God, the whole thing just sucks -- people are just determined to fuck everything up.  But Mardi's staying tho -- working and going to school at night again this year.  Where the hell does she have to go?  If I didn't go back to Boston where the hell would I go?  I was thinking today -- up on the top of the back field behind our house -- why can't we all be back where we were 2 or 3 years ago, only be what we are now -- just have our new selves there-- I had it all figured out anyway.  I went out in the field w/ Harry to get away from PEOPLE -- I swear I'm going to be a hermit in another year or so -- so I hope I see you before then so I can talk to you.

I saw Mike when he was home -- he's applying to the Peace Corps for next year -- duh!  And Tina and Mark are just about goners -- they're both hitched by now.  So what else is new -- no new lights in my horizon -- for once in 3 years -- everything seems planned out and all I have to do is follow it all through.  I'm going home for a while -- then back to Boston to old Calumet St. and the old job at Mass Mental.  And every fall I'm usually freaking out wondering what to do -- it all seems so dull this way -- maybe something will come up and fuck me up -- if I'm lucky.  You know my Boston address -- right?  It'll be me and Doreen and Nancy and -- get this -- Doreen and John are getting married -- that's too much in itself -- and planning to live with us in the same place when they do.  Shades of Apt 203, Lake Street!  Oh we are just so unconventional aren't we?  Now I am going to end all this -- just write soon.  Take care Paul -- I hate to say it, but I will (see you at Christmas) SHIT!

August 27, 1971 (Letter from Mike)

I knew you weren't in Boston because Boobie was home and said you hadn't called.  But I didn't say anything to her.  To be truthful, it didn't surprise me in the least.  If that's what you need, then who am I to comment?  I hope your parents are taking it okay.  Just make sure you don't wind up a cook the rest of your life.  Do me a favor and try to get a hold of Bagwell as long as you're there.  Her father's address is:  Box 3266, Grover City, Cal.  Please do me that favor.  My application for the Peace Corps is in and the references should all be in within the next week so I should either get canned or interviewed within the next month or so.  I'll let you know.  After Sept. 22:  101 A Heritage, B-W College, 44017.  I'm hoping to hear more form you soon.  Good luck buddy.

I could use a box of California sand.

August 26, 1971 (Letter from Mardi)

I was really racking my brains out wondering where the fuck you'd end up!

Write and give me all the highlights of your trip out and "California dreamin'" adventures.  By what route did you do?  Shit, I'd never go back to Buffalo!  Will he stay or will he return?  My mother and Mike thought for sure you'd be in Boston, at least that's what Foster said?!  You should send him a "knock" postcard or something!  My mother had to fill out a Peace Corps questionaire for Mike.  She's there "duh".  I'm sure she wrote a decent letter to them though.  I heard on the news that the first Peace Corps volunteer was murdered!! That might scare him off.

Sue Smith has been out here this week and we've really had a good time just seeing old friends we both hadn't seen in awhile.

Well, Tina's getting married Sat.  Mark is getting married Sept 11!  Jodee Scalise I hear is engaged to Bill Andrews that dud!

Barb was home for about four hours -- sure I mean four days.  Her mother went in the hospital when she found a lump in her breast and they removed it and found that cancer had already spread so she's having cobalt treatments. They said it was the "slow spreading" kind.  It's really a shitty thing to have happen.  I'm planing on going out to Boston for a week and then Barb is moving home for a month or two.  I really don't know what's to happen.

Anyway I better get going.  Take care and write soon.

(8/30/71)  Hello again, Sept is almost here!  Have you made any major decisions lately?  I must get to work now, so write soon!